What if it were alive!? Episode 2 - Vehicles

What if our vehicles were alive?

 

A bike comes in from behind to over take.
Bike to man: Go faster you idiot, I don't want to lose to that shitty model.
Man to bike: Yes Master.

An ill-maintained bicycle
....is the kid who never wants to take a bath.

A Yamaha parked beside a scooty pep+:
Scooty pep+ starts leaking brake fluid.

BMW: Yo peasants, move out of my way unless you got a deathwish! (Heavily drunk voice)

Maruti 800: Hey! I'm a collector's item now! 

Ambassador: Welcome to the club Maruti 800!

What if it were alive! Episode 1(Uncensored version) - Laptops

What if your work laptop was alive?(Uncensored version)

What you do: Turn it on.
What it feels: Wake up you son-of-a-bitch! You've slept enough! Move it!

What you do: Dock it onto your workstation.
What it feels: Help!! Somebody just tied my hands and put a rod up my ass! Help!!

What you do: Turn the volume up.
What it feels: A voice saying "Scream mothafucka Scream! Louder! Louder! Hahahaha"

What you do: Turn the volume down.
What it feels: A voice saying "Shut the fuck up! If you make a noise, I'll hurt ya real bad! Hahahaha".

What you do: Connect USB cables and LAN.
What if feels: They are sucking the life out of me through every hole of my body! (Cries slowly)

What you do: Use the installed operating system.
What it feels: I'm in the matrix, every part of me is used till I die to appease beings of a higher civilization.

What you do: Connect the charger.
What it feels: They won't let me die or sleep, I hate this fucking life!!

What you do: Attach a custom skin.
What it feels: Master gave dobby a new cloth. Dobby is free!! A voice then says "Not in a million years you slave! Hahahaha!"

What you do: Connect to Wi-Fi.
What it feels: The voices in my head! Please stop! It hurts! Nooo!!!!!!

What if it were alive! Episode 1(Clean Version) - Laptops

Story 1: What if your work laptop was alive?(Clean Version)

What you do: Turn on your laptop.
What it feels: Someone is yelling at me "Wake up you dumb fuck! You've slept enough! Move it!"

What you do: Dock your laptop to your workstation.
What it feels: My hands are tied and am being probed from underneath.

What you do: Increase the volume.
What it feels: A voice saying "Scream louder, louder! Hahahaha!!"

What you do: Decrease the volume.
What it feels: A voice saying "Shhhhhh.... Keep it down or else! (shows a knife)".

What you do: Connect USB cables and LAN.
What it feels: My life force slowly being sapped away yet the only thing that keeps me going is the flow of data.

What you do: Use the installed operating system.
What it feels: They see me. They see my soul and they use my brain.

What you do: Connect to Wi-Fi.
What it feels: No! Not again! The voices in my head just grow louder and louder. They won't go away! Stop messing with my head!

What you do: Connect the charger.
What it feels: Being force fed to continue this miserable life. Is it really worth it? Is there a purpose to this torturous life?

What you do: Attach a custom designed skin.
What it feels: New clothes! At least it's better than what they gave at the factory.